I guess everyone has felt that in their lives at some point or another. That’s exactly how I have become ever since I lost mom it’s like i am the saddest and depressed soul ever that existed in the universe. I have started isolating people around me. I speak less and less with each passing day. It’s like i just want to talk to her and no body else. I know i am hurting people who care about me but i can’t help this feeling. I can see and feel myself changing. I have lost all my hopes and i trust no one now. It’s like i have given up. Once a bubbly girl is slowly turning into a gloomy and pessimistic woman whose heart is filled with so much pain and sorrow that she started hating mankind. She started hating herself.
I hardly go out even if I do every time I see someone I know i feel i shouldn’t have. I don’t understand why I am feeling this way. I have been binge watching sad films. Even if i show kindness towards other people they are trying to take advantage of that. So i have become bitter and cold towards them.
Maybe I am just presuming that everyone is out there to hurt me in which ever possible way and my behavior is hurting people. So I feel guilty. I feel like I am losing myself. It’s a mess…….. my life, my emotions, everything.
If you are also feeling this way then trust me when I say I understand maybe time will heal the wounds and these feelings. So I am giving time some time. I am not someone who can advice people but I am just trying to say that I understand.
You are strong and this phase of your life will be over as well because BABY, NOTHING LASTS FOREVER.